1 00:00:10,922 --> 00:00:13,192 ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:18,203 --> 00:00:20,140 Oh. [grunts] 3 00:00:25,050 --> 00:00:26,485 [teen boy] Mr. Marquez. 4 00:00:26,485 --> 00:00:28,524 - Mr. Marquez! - [talking over each other] 5 00:00:28,524 --> 00:00:30,094 - Whoa. Hold up. Whoa, whoa. - What? 6 00:00:30,094 --> 00:00:32,398 What? What? What? What's going on? 7 00:00:32,398 --> 00:00:34,202 - We need your help right now. - With Powderpuff. 8 00:00:34,202 --> 00:00:36,272 Powderpuff? What's Powderpuff? 9 00:00:36,272 --> 00:00:37,676 You know, when the girls play football, 10 00:00:37,676 --> 00:00:39,713 and the football players dress as cheerleaders. 11 00:00:39,713 --> 00:00:41,482 - Oh, that. - Yeah. 12 00:00:41,482 --> 00:00:43,554 I'm sorry, I don't know anything about football. I gotta-- 13 00:00:43,554 --> 00:00:44,790 - No, no, no, no, no. - Mr. Marquez. 14 00:00:44,790 --> 00:00:45,859 Nobody's mad about 15 00:00:45,859 --> 00:00:47,361 the girls playing football. 16 00:00:47,361 --> 00:00:48,898 They're mad about us dressing up as cheerleaders. 17 00:00:48,898 --> 00:00:50,535 And why are you guys coming to me? 'Cause I'm gay? 18 00:00:50,535 --> 00:00:52,171 - Uh-huh. - This is very sweet of you guys, 19 00:00:52,171 --> 00:00:53,574 but I don't want to be on the news as, like, 20 00:00:53,574 --> 00:00:55,143 the gay guy fighting for young men's rights 21 00:00:55,143 --> 00:00:56,547 to dress up like girls. 22 00:00:56,547 --> 00:00:58,751 Come on, Mr. Marquez, this is our senior year. 23 00:00:58,751 --> 00:01:00,420 It's the most things we look forward to. 24 00:01:00,420 --> 00:01:02,892 It's the most things you look forward to? 25 00:01:02,892 --> 00:01:04,328 Jason, the grammar. 26 00:01:04,328 --> 00:01:06,133 It's the thing you look forward to the most. 27 00:01:06,133 --> 00:01:07,803 Wow, yeah. That is way better. 28 00:01:07,803 --> 00:01:09,205 See, you're already helping. 29 00:01:09,205 --> 00:01:10,841 Okay, I'm sorry, guys, I just-- It's not-- 30 00:01:10,841 --> 00:01:12,377 Come on. Please think about it. 31 00:01:12,377 --> 00:01:14,315 I'll talk to Coach Hillridge after school. How's that? 32 00:01:14,315 --> 00:01:15,551 Yeah, let's go! 33 00:01:15,551 --> 00:01:17,087 [all cheering] 34 00:01:17,087 --> 00:01:19,058 [all barking] 35 00:01:19,058 --> 00:01:20,528 Break! 36 00:01:20,528 --> 00:01:23,299 ♪♪ I wanna take you in my arms ♪ 37 00:01:23,299 --> 00:01:25,403 ♪♪ You're taking me ♪ 38 00:01:25,403 --> 00:01:28,142 ♪♪ To the point of no return ♪ 39 00:01:29,345 --> 00:01:30,681 ♪♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪ 40 00:01:30,681 --> 00:01:32,484 ♪♪ You're taking me... ♪ 41 00:01:32,484 --> 00:01:33,554 - [whistle blows] - [Markie] All right, huddle up. 42 00:01:33,554 --> 00:01:35,892 Listen. You ladies all begged 43 00:01:35,892 --> 00:01:37,194 for a female coach this year 44 00:01:37,194 --> 00:01:39,031 for Powderpuff, and since everybody gets 45 00:01:39,031 --> 00:01:40,100 what they want these days, 46 00:01:40,100 --> 00:01:42,171 give it up for Ms. Sanders. 47 00:01:42,171 --> 00:01:44,275 - [applause] - Hi! Thank you. Unfortunately, 48 00:01:44,275 --> 00:01:46,412 I don't know all the technical 49 00:01:46,412 --> 00:01:48,116 dos and don'ts of football per se, 50 00:01:48,116 --> 00:01:50,588 so I brought Coach Hillridge here. 51 00:01:50,588 --> 00:01:52,324 He's just gonna assist me on small things, 52 00:01:52,324 --> 00:01:54,596 like when you catch the ball, which way do you go? 53 00:01:54,596 --> 00:01:56,834 And then why do you ever kick the ball? 54 00:01:56,834 --> 00:01:58,704 That's right, Ms. Sanders is your coach today, 55 00:01:58,704 --> 00:01:59,907 so just ignore me. 56 00:01:59,907 --> 00:02:01,677 You won't notice me at all. I'll just be here 57 00:02:01,677 --> 00:02:04,482 teaching her how to teach you how to play football. 58 00:02:04,482 --> 00:02:06,285 - That's right. - Tell 'em to start running sprints. 59 00:02:06,285 --> 00:02:09,125 - Sprints! - Come on. 60 00:02:09,125 --> 00:02:11,162 Evan, catch. 61 00:02:12,431 --> 00:02:13,868 Hey, I told your football players 62 00:02:13,868 --> 00:02:15,872 I'd help them save their Powderpuff performance. 63 00:02:15,872 --> 00:02:17,174 You're trying to cancel that? 64 00:02:17,174 --> 00:02:18,477 You think I want to cancel Powderpuff? 65 00:02:18,477 --> 00:02:20,649 Why? I love that shit. 66 00:02:20,649 --> 00:02:24,154 Come on, big football dudes dressed up like cheerleaders? 67 00:02:24,154 --> 00:02:25,391 Ow! 68 00:02:25,391 --> 00:02:26,459 That's the height of comedy, man. 69 00:02:26,459 --> 00:02:27,996 - Come on. - God! 70 00:02:27,996 --> 00:02:29,699 - Gwen! - You gotta take it up with Moretti. 71 00:02:29,699 --> 00:02:31,269 - I'm taking it up with Moretti. - Catch him. 72 00:02:31,269 --> 00:02:32,471 What do I do now? 73 00:02:32,471 --> 00:02:33,707 Burpees. 74 00:02:33,707 --> 00:02:35,545 - It's time for blurpees, girls. - Burpees. 75 00:02:35,545 --> 00:02:37,181 - Hey, Grant. - No, Evan. 76 00:02:37,181 --> 00:02:38,350 - Grant... - No! 77 00:02:38,350 --> 00:02:39,385 I'm off the clock. 78 00:02:39,385 --> 00:02:40,487 My car is technically 79 00:02:40,487 --> 00:02:41,657 - not school grounds. - Listen, 80 00:02:41,657 --> 00:02:43,460 what is this Powderpuff thing? 81 00:02:43,460 --> 00:02:45,096 You're canceling this Powderpuff thing? What is this? 82 00:02:45,096 --> 00:02:47,736 We're not canceling anything. Nothing is being canceled. 83 00:02:47,736 --> 00:02:50,542 Look, it's not... It's being discussed. 84 00:02:50,542 --> 00:02:52,277 It's not all of Powderpuff. 85 00:02:52,277 --> 00:02:55,017 It's just the... the boys' cheerleading performance 86 00:02:55,017 --> 00:02:57,020 has become sort of a hot-button issue, all right? 87 00:02:57,020 --> 00:03:00,160 - Just tell the parents to lighten up. - It's not the parents. 88 00:03:00,160 --> 00:03:01,495 - What? - It's not the parents. 89 00:03:01,495 --> 00:03:02,933 The parents love it. Big football guys 90 00:03:02,933 --> 00:03:05,437 in girls' clothes; it's funny stuff, Evan. 91 00:03:05,437 --> 00:03:06,874 Even I, back in the day, 92 00:03:06,874 --> 00:03:09,412 - I was in Powderpuff back in the day. - Really? 93 00:03:09,412 --> 00:03:11,416 Yeah, we had a cheer about our butts, kicking butts. 94 00:03:11,416 --> 00:03:13,186 That's me. I didn't even have to shave my legs. 95 00:03:13,186 --> 00:03:14,790 You look like Hilary Duff. 96 00:03:14,790 --> 00:03:16,392 - Thank you. - Wait, so if it's not the parents, 97 00:03:16,392 --> 00:03:18,531 - then who's trying to cancel it? - The students. 98 00:03:18,531 --> 00:03:22,839 The LGBTQ IA2S Alliance. 99 00:03:22,839 --> 00:03:24,676 That's crazy. Why didn't they just come talk to me? 100 00:03:24,676 --> 00:03:26,245 I helped rhinestone their flag. 101 00:03:26,245 --> 00:03:28,149 They think you're homophobic now. 102 00:03:28,149 --> 00:03:29,485 - What? Why? - They think that 103 00:03:29,485 --> 00:03:30,989 you don't believe in lesbians. 104 00:03:30,989 --> 00:03:32,291 Oh, come on. 105 00:03:32,291 --> 00:03:34,061 That was taken out of context. 106 00:03:34,061 --> 00:03:35,632 What context was it in? 107 00:03:35,632 --> 00:03:37,702 Just, I was having a regular conversation with Gwen, 108 00:03:37,702 --> 00:03:39,338 and I was telling her I have a hard time believing 109 00:03:39,338 --> 00:03:41,877 that lesbians aren't attracted to men. 110 00:03:44,649 --> 00:03:45,885 [Evan] Okay, so you're saying... 111 00:03:45,885 --> 00:03:48,389 Powderpuff is this old boomer tradition 112 00:03:48,389 --> 00:03:50,026 where the boys get to make fun of the girls. 113 00:03:50,026 --> 00:03:53,099 And more importantly, these football players 114 00:03:53,099 --> 00:03:55,003 are "gender switching" as a joke 115 00:03:55,003 --> 00:03:57,040 when there are people in this school who are actually 116 00:03:57,040 --> 00:03:58,276 non-binary or trans. 117 00:03:58,276 --> 00:04:00,013 - And that is not a joke. - Pablo! 118 00:04:00,013 --> 00:04:02,250 Wake up. But is anybody 119 00:04:02,250 --> 00:04:03,587 actually upset about it? 120 00:04:03,587 --> 00:04:04,956 Like, in my experience, if men want to 121 00:04:04,956 --> 00:04:06,927 dress up as women, you should just let them. 122 00:04:06,927 --> 00:04:08,196 Yeah, let my boys have fun. 123 00:04:08,196 --> 00:04:09,733 [Becca] I actually love Powderpuff 124 00:04:09,733 --> 00:04:12,438 because the boys have to admit how hard our cheers are. 125 00:04:12,438 --> 00:04:14,108 Becca, you literally quit cheerleading. 126 00:04:14,108 --> 00:04:16,146 Yeah, because I literally died for three minutes last year. 127 00:04:16,146 --> 00:04:17,147 I went to hell. 128 00:04:17,147 --> 00:04:18,517 Stop talking about that. 129 00:04:18,517 --> 00:04:20,286 I've never liked Powderpuff, personally. 130 00:04:20,286 --> 00:04:21,990 Why, Jeff? 131 00:04:21,990 --> 00:04:24,996 - It sickens me. The beauty's too intense. - That's crazy. 132 00:04:24,996 --> 00:04:29,105 So who here is in the LGBTQIA2S Alliance? Okay, look, 133 00:04:29,105 --> 00:04:30,541 if you guys had come to me, 134 00:04:30,541 --> 00:04:32,578 I would have gently reminded you that, 135 00:04:32,578 --> 00:04:34,381 while your hearts may be in the right place, 136 00:04:34,381 --> 00:04:36,987 in actuality, you're banning a drag performance 137 00:04:36,987 --> 00:04:38,457 at a school in the South. 138 00:04:38,457 --> 00:04:40,461 - Ooh... - Stop being a contrarian. 139 00:04:40,461 --> 00:04:42,064 You know what's bullshit? 140 00:04:42,064 --> 00:04:45,003 That these cool jock kids get to dress however they want, 141 00:04:45,003 --> 00:04:46,373 and everybody loves it. 142 00:04:46,373 --> 00:04:48,376 But they're doing it as a joke. 143 00:04:48,376 --> 00:04:49,780 It's not like real, authentic drag. 144 00:04:49,780 --> 00:04:52,017 So you guys just want the boys to be authentic 145 00:04:52,017 --> 00:04:54,154 and respectful in their performance? 146 00:04:54,154 --> 00:04:55,423 That would make you happy? 147 00:04:55,423 --> 00:04:57,027 - Yeah. - Yeah, sure. 148 00:04:57,027 --> 00:04:58,597 Okay. Good to know. 149 00:04:58,597 --> 00:05:01,503 - Yes, Tiffany? - This is literally Book Club. 150 00:05:01,503 --> 00:05:03,541 Like, why are we talking about this? 151 00:05:03,541 --> 00:05:06,580 ♪♪ We all about it, uh-huh. ♪ 152 00:05:08,250 --> 00:05:09,819 [sighs] [inhaling] 153 00:05:09,819 --> 00:05:11,288 [Evan] So when you talk to the boys, just, like, 154 00:05:11,288 --> 00:05:12,726 keep it base level, keep it easy. 155 00:05:12,726 --> 00:05:14,562 You know, they're new to all this. 156 00:05:14,562 --> 00:05:16,131 All right, I got it, yeah. 157 00:05:16,131 --> 00:05:18,103 They're gonna be in shock. 158 00:05:18,103 --> 00:05:19,304 Hey, you still do those, uh, 159 00:05:19,304 --> 00:05:20,975 - poetry jams? - [laughs] No. 160 00:05:20,975 --> 00:05:23,747 That was just at AandM. I stopped after college. 161 00:05:23,747 --> 00:05:25,417 Oh, I miss those college parties. 162 00:05:25,417 --> 00:05:27,522 I remember you, like, refused to take photos 163 00:05:27,522 --> 00:05:28,858 with a digital camera. 164 00:05:28,858 --> 00:05:30,528 You'd be like, "I only use real film." 165 00:05:30,528 --> 00:05:32,431 - Right, right. - And you had that mullet. 166 00:05:32,431 --> 00:05:34,368 I'm much less of a loser now. 167 00:05:34,368 --> 00:05:35,403 What do you do here? 168 00:05:35,403 --> 00:05:36,840 - I teach English. - Oh. 169 00:05:36,840 --> 00:05:37,909 Hey, guys! 170 00:05:37,909 --> 00:05:40,548 Um, I would like to introduce you today 171 00:05:40,548 --> 00:05:42,519 to a very special friend of mine. 172 00:05:42,519 --> 00:05:44,689 This is Shazam. 173 00:05:44,689 --> 00:05:46,827 Hello. Hello, my little babies, hello. 174 00:05:46,827 --> 00:05:48,731 - [all] Hi, Shazam. - Hi. 175 00:05:48,731 --> 00:05:50,701 So Shazam was the queen of drag back in college, 176 00:05:50,701 --> 00:05:52,437 and now she has a long-running show in Austin 177 00:05:52,437 --> 00:05:54,275 - called Woman of La Mancha. - That actually got canceled. 178 00:05:54,275 --> 00:05:57,080 The show is now called Drink Ticket Tuesday. 179 00:05:57,080 --> 00:05:58,717 So when you guys are old enough to drink, 180 00:05:58,717 --> 00:06:00,020 maybe you can go check that out. 181 00:06:00,020 --> 00:06:01,322 Or-- Don't tell anybody I said that. 182 00:06:01,322 --> 00:06:03,293 So, are you, like, a dude? 183 00:06:03,293 --> 00:06:04,461 I'm like a dude, yeah. 184 00:06:04,461 --> 00:06:05,798 - [laughs] - I'm cool, like you guys. 185 00:06:05,798 --> 00:06:06,700 I'm a cool dude, 186 00:06:06,700 --> 00:06:08,537 I sit home, I wear tube socks. 187 00:06:08,537 --> 00:06:10,641 I blow my nose. I have hair. 188 00:06:10,641 --> 00:06:13,079 But when she's dressed like this, she is Shazam. 189 00:06:13,079 --> 00:06:16,887 When I'm dressed like this, I'm your mama. 190 00:06:16,887 --> 00:06:18,957 - Okay. - [Shazam] Quick question. 191 00:06:18,957 --> 00:06:20,894 - Does anybody own a ferret? - Do they have ferrets? 192 00:06:20,894 --> 00:06:22,565 I'm just trying to connect with the kids. 193 00:06:22,565 --> 00:06:24,168 They're not eight. 194 00:06:24,168 --> 00:06:25,237 I don't know how old they are. 195 00:06:25,237 --> 00:06:26,807 So here's the deal, guys. 196 00:06:26,807 --> 00:06:28,544 Shazam is gonna teach you guys 197 00:06:28,544 --> 00:06:30,515 the proper way to dress like a girl. 198 00:06:30,515 --> 00:06:32,217 The right way, you know. It's a little bit like 199 00:06:32,217 --> 00:06:34,622 if you guys are gonna drink or experiment with drugs, 200 00:06:34,622 --> 00:06:36,025 I'd rather you do it in the house. 201 00:06:36,025 --> 00:06:38,463 That's not a great example, but she and I, 202 00:06:38,463 --> 00:06:40,433 we're gonna be your coaches in this. 203 00:06:40,433 --> 00:06:41,770 Uh, them, like, real titties or, like, 204 00:06:41,770 --> 00:06:43,005 - what you got going on? - [guys laugh] 205 00:06:43,005 --> 00:06:45,511 Honey, no. This is a breast plate. 206 00:06:45,511 --> 00:06:47,147 It looks great, right? Very realistic. 207 00:06:47,147 --> 00:06:49,451 - Yeah, it looks awesome. - We call it a titty bib. 208 00:06:49,451 --> 00:06:51,222 And this is a lace front wig. 209 00:06:51,222 --> 00:06:52,825 - My mom has that. - Okay. 210 00:06:52,825 --> 00:06:55,531 So is there, like, a titty bib for your dick, too? 211 00:06:55,531 --> 00:06:56,633 Or, like, where's that at? 212 00:06:56,633 --> 00:06:58,537 Yes, I am tucked. 213 00:06:58,537 --> 00:07:00,607 So it's like a jock strap, or like a cup. 214 00:07:00,607 --> 00:07:02,178 It just kind of... [makes popping noise] 215 00:07:02,178 --> 00:07:04,516 - [student] Does it pop in? - Yeah. I tie it on the end 216 00:07:04,516 --> 00:07:05,985 of a ping-pong ball and shove it up my ass. 217 00:07:05,985 --> 00:07:08,524 - [laughter] - Don't laugh. That's rude. 218 00:07:08,524 --> 00:07:09,993 [Evan] Yeah-- No, no. You guys can laugh. 219 00:07:09,993 --> 00:07:11,261 This is what I'm saying. 220 00:07:11,261 --> 00:07:14,669 Shazam is very funny. Drag can be very funny. 221 00:07:14,669 --> 00:07:16,472 So if you guys, for this Powderpuff performance, 222 00:07:16,472 --> 00:07:18,443 instead of doing joke drag or half-drag, 223 00:07:18,443 --> 00:07:19,846 or just the cheerleading outfits, 224 00:07:19,846 --> 00:07:22,418 if you just do authentic, real drag like this, 225 00:07:22,418 --> 00:07:25,457 then the LGBTQ Alliance cannot be upset. 226 00:07:25,457 --> 00:07:28,463 So you want us dressed like this? 227 00:07:28,463 --> 00:07:30,668 Oh, honey, I don't think you have the balls 228 00:07:30,668 --> 00:07:32,203 to dress like this. 229 00:07:32,203 --> 00:07:33,574 - [laughter] - [all] Ooh. 230 00:07:33,574 --> 00:07:35,778 And that-- this is good. This is the thing. 231 00:07:35,778 --> 00:07:37,882 She just read you, and you can read her back. 232 00:07:37,882 --> 00:07:39,886 And I'm an accelerated reader, Tray. 233 00:07:39,886 --> 00:07:40,921 Damn. 234 00:07:40,921 --> 00:07:42,257 Drag is about self-expression. 235 00:07:42,257 --> 00:07:43,627 It's about being larger than life. 236 00:07:43,627 --> 00:07:45,029 Shazam used to have a motto in college. 237 00:07:45,029 --> 00:07:46,934 You used to say, "We don't mark it, baby..." 238 00:07:46,934 --> 00:07:48,637 -"We do everything full-out." - We go full-out. 239 00:07:48,637 --> 00:07:50,207 What is "mark it"? 240 00:07:50,207 --> 00:07:51,810 - like... - When you don't go all the way on something. 241 00:07:51,810 --> 00:07:55,150 Yeah. It's like one, two, three, four, blah, blah. 242 00:07:55,150 --> 00:07:56,853 You know, you want to be like... [makes whooshing noise] 243 00:07:56,853 --> 00:07:58,791 Like when you don't hustle in football. 244 00:07:58,791 --> 00:08:00,093 Oh, okay. 245 00:08:00,093 --> 00:08:03,400 So we're gonna go all-out. You guys on board? Maybe? 246 00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:05,103 Mm... 247 00:08:05,103 --> 00:08:06,740 [sighs] 248 00:08:06,740 --> 00:08:08,376 Fuck it, it's my senior year. 249 00:08:08,376 --> 00:08:09,946 Let's get it for Coach Shazam. 250 00:08:09,946 --> 00:08:11,850 - [all cheering] - Let's go. 251 00:08:11,850 --> 00:08:14,121 - [cheering, chanting] - Yeah, Coach Shazam! 252 00:08:14,121 --> 00:08:15,958 - [students barking] - [Shazam] Okay. Uh... oh. 253 00:08:20,367 --> 00:08:22,204 Sarah, you hold the ball. You're gonna hike it to, to who? 254 00:08:22,204 --> 00:08:24,676 - To the quarterback. - To the quarterback, yes. Amazing. 255 00:08:24,676 --> 00:08:26,345 Great. Once you catch it, 256 00:08:26,345 --> 00:08:27,849 you're just gonna throw it to... 257 00:08:27,849 --> 00:08:29,820 - who? - To the receiver. 258 00:08:29,820 --> 00:08:32,659 Ella, catch it. Yes! I love this! 259 00:08:32,659 --> 00:08:34,128 Okay, so once you catch it-- 260 00:08:34,128 --> 00:08:36,766 Oh, oh, oh. Eh, eh, I know this. 261 00:08:36,766 --> 00:08:38,570 You guys are all gonna tackle her. 262 00:08:38,570 --> 00:08:39,906 - Okay? You're gonna get her! - Wait, wait. 263 00:08:39,906 --> 00:08:42,210 Put your body into her, chest forward. 264 00:08:42,210 --> 00:08:44,281 Wait, aren't we playing flag football? 265 00:08:44,281 --> 00:08:45,685 - Yeah. - Uh, no. What? 266 00:08:45,685 --> 00:08:46,987 - Yes. Flag football. - What? No. 267 00:08:46,987 --> 00:08:48,657 Why wouldn't they play tackle football? 268 00:08:48,657 --> 00:08:50,393 So they don't injure themselves or each other. 269 00:08:50,393 --> 00:08:51,897 Are you kidding? 270 00:08:51,897 --> 00:08:53,199 - No. - I mean, God, here we go. 271 00:08:53,199 --> 00:08:55,838 Girls aren't allowed to hurt anyone. 272 00:08:55,838 --> 00:08:57,407 This is why we get kidnapped. 273 00:08:57,407 --> 00:08:59,612 Someone says, "Get in my car." 274 00:08:59,612 --> 00:09:01,048 We go along with it 275 00:09:01,048 --> 00:09:02,618 'cause we don't want to hurt their feelings, 276 00:09:02,618 --> 00:09:04,589 and it turns out to be the killer. 277 00:09:04,589 --> 00:09:05,758 This is a football field, it's a game. 278 00:09:05,758 --> 00:09:07,293 We're not worried about killers. 279 00:09:07,293 --> 00:09:08,964 - You're not. - Excuse me? 280 00:09:08,964 --> 00:09:10,534 Coach Hillridge, you can walk to your car 281 00:09:10,534 --> 00:09:12,237 alone at night without thinking someone's gonna kill you. 282 00:09:12,237 --> 00:09:14,174 You can walk alone to your car tonight as well. 283 00:09:14,174 --> 00:09:16,613 - Just don't park in a shit neighborhood. - Okay, okay. 284 00:09:16,613 --> 00:09:17,848 You're-you're kidding, right? 285 00:09:17,848 --> 00:09:20,153 - I'm not. - I'm a 110-pound girl. 286 00:09:20,153 --> 00:09:22,859 - The whole world is a bad neighborhood to me. - That part. 287 00:09:22,859 --> 00:09:24,261 You know what, I don't think you know 288 00:09:24,261 --> 00:09:25,865 what it's like to be a woman, obviously. 289 00:09:25,865 --> 00:09:27,300 - That's not the point. - Your biggest fear is 290 00:09:27,300 --> 00:09:28,871 getting made fun of. 291 00:09:28,871 --> 00:09:31,008 Our biggest fear is getting raped and killed. 292 00:09:31,008 --> 00:09:33,513 Whoa, whoa, whoa! The girls do not need to hear about this. 293 00:09:33,513 --> 00:09:35,349 They hear about this all the time. 294 00:09:35,349 --> 00:09:36,653 When I toured Texas State, 295 00:09:36,653 --> 00:09:38,256 this is, like, all they talked about. 296 00:09:38,256 --> 00:09:40,126 Did they show you where all those emergency poles are 297 00:09:40,126 --> 00:09:41,530 - in case you're getting serial killed at collage? - Yeah. 298 00:09:41,530 --> 00:09:42,798 Yeah, they had to. 299 00:09:42,798 --> 00:09:44,635 - Exactly. - Okay, well, first and foremost, 300 00:09:44,635 --> 00:09:45,738 we're not talking about getting 301 00:09:45,738 --> 00:09:47,040 serial killed at college. 302 00:09:47,040 --> 00:09:48,944 This is Powderpuff. This is fun, okay? 303 00:09:48,944 --> 00:09:50,782 How do you expect them to defend themselves 304 00:09:50,782 --> 00:09:52,217 on the field... 305 00:09:52,217 --> 00:09:53,620 - Mm. - ...if they can't defend themselves 306 00:09:53,620 --> 00:09:55,023 out in the world? 307 00:09:55,023 --> 00:09:56,358 How are they gonna defend themselves 308 00:09:56,358 --> 00:09:57,795 against someone like the Highway Killer? 309 00:09:57,795 --> 00:09:58,798 - Oh, my God. - Oh, yeah. 310 00:09:58,798 --> 00:09:59,932 Who's the Highway Killer? 311 00:09:59,932 --> 00:10:01,870 The podcast, The Highway Killer: 312 00:10:01,870 --> 00:10:03,406 Murder at the Speed of Death? 313 00:10:03,406 --> 00:10:04,909 Yeah. It's really good. 314 00:10:04,909 --> 00:10:06,746 - Yeah. - The chemistry between the two of them, 315 00:10:06,746 --> 00:10:08,818 - The way they're making each other laugh? - I know. 316 00:10:08,818 --> 00:10:10,588 - What's it called? Wait, what's it... - The Highway Killer. 317 00:10:10,588 --> 00:10:11,623 - [Gwen] Get it out. - Okay, wait, yeah. 318 00:10:11,623 --> 00:10:13,092 I'll give it a go. Why not? 319 00:10:13,092 --> 00:10:14,294 302 episodes. 320 00:10:14,294 --> 00:10:15,865 By the way, routes. 321 00:10:15,865 --> 00:10:17,467 Oh, yeah, run routes, guys. 322 00:10:17,467 --> 00:10:19,137 - Get it! - [blows whistle] Come on. 323 00:10:19,639 --> 00:10:21,041 I asked you not to get involved. 324 00:10:21,041 --> 00:10:23,346 Grant, if you're teaching somebody to play piano, 325 00:10:23,346 --> 00:10:24,649 who do you get to help them? 326 00:10:24,649 --> 00:10:25,618 A piano teacher. So if you're teaching guys 327 00:10:25,618 --> 00:10:27,287 to dress up like girls... 328 00:10:27,287 --> 00:10:28,757 Evan, I'm already getting calls from the parents about this. 329 00:10:28,757 --> 00:10:30,159 I don't know who this person is. 330 00:10:30,159 --> 00:10:32,030 She could be a lunatic, she could be a criminal. 331 00:10:32,030 --> 00:10:33,465 Because she happens to be a drag queen, 332 00:10:33,465 --> 00:10:34,569 she's a lunatic and a criminal? 333 00:10:34,569 --> 00:10:35,671 Are you hearing yourself? 334 00:10:35,671 --> 00:10:37,274 That's not what I mean. 335 00:10:37,274 --> 00:10:38,810 You can't bring in strangers to teach at the school. 336 00:10:38,810 --> 00:10:40,647 - You can't do that. - I was trying to satisfy 337 00:10:40,647 --> 00:10:42,585 the LGBTQIA2S Alliance. 338 00:10:42,585 --> 00:10:45,691 Why? Why succumb to the whims of these four gay kids? 339 00:10:45,691 --> 00:10:47,027 I never said that. 340 00:10:47,027 --> 00:10:48,496 There's at least eight of them, right? 341 00:10:48,496 --> 00:10:49,799 Evan, you just have to listen to them complain. 342 00:10:49,799 --> 00:10:50,834 You don't actually have to do 343 00:10:50,834 --> 00:10:52,104 anything about their problems. 344 00:10:52,104 --> 00:10:53,507 I thought their concerns were valid. 345 00:10:53,507 --> 00:10:55,077 Valid? Here's what's valid. 346 00:10:55,077 --> 00:10:56,613 Those football players' parents are gonna be there, 347 00:10:56,613 --> 00:10:58,049 Superintendent Boone will be there, 348 00:10:58,049 --> 00:11:00,788 and this, this is what they're expecting to see. 349 00:11:00,788 --> 00:11:01,790 I'll read along, all right? 350 00:11:01,790 --> 00:11:03,426 "Appropriate and approved attire 351 00:11:03,426 --> 00:11:05,998 "for the Powderpuff halftime performance: 352 00:11:05,998 --> 00:11:07,936 "hair ties, face glitter, 353 00:11:07,936 --> 00:11:09,739 - Polish... - ...nail polish, cheerleading outfits." 354 00:11:09,739 --> 00:11:11,108 This is ridiculous. 355 00:11:11,108 --> 00:11:12,377 It needs to be cute, it needs to be fun. 356 00:11:12,377 --> 00:11:13,412 Everybody's gonna be happy. 357 00:11:13,412 --> 00:11:14,782 We're gonna have a great time. 358 00:11:14,782 --> 00:11:17,220 No one gets fired. Think of your job, Evan. 359 00:11:17,220 --> 00:11:19,191 Think of your job. 360 00:11:19,191 --> 00:11:21,261 So, ladies, you've got these flags. 361 00:11:21,261 --> 00:11:22,698 If someone's trying to get your flag, 362 00:11:22,698 --> 00:11:24,267 I'm thinking it's a lot of this. 363 00:11:24,267 --> 00:11:25,737 Like, it's in the hips. So try it. 364 00:11:25,737 --> 00:11:27,274 Like, if someone's trying to get you, 365 00:11:27,274 --> 00:11:28,543 - and you're juking-- - [Markie] Okay, okay, stop. 366 00:11:28,543 --> 00:11:29,779 Stop what you're doing, stop. 367 00:11:29,779 --> 00:11:31,649 I listened to, like, eight episodes 368 00:11:31,649 --> 00:11:32,685 of that podcast you told me about, 369 00:11:32,685 --> 00:11:33,687 and I could care less about 370 00:11:33,687 --> 00:11:35,022 y'all running plays. 371 00:11:35,022 --> 00:11:37,094 Running out routes, in routes, posts. 372 00:11:37,094 --> 00:11:39,464 I care more about you not ending up 373 00:11:39,464 --> 00:11:41,603 in tiny little pieces in someone's freezer. 374 00:11:41,603 --> 00:11:42,906 We need to forget about football, 375 00:11:42,906 --> 00:11:45,410 and teach these girls self-defense. 376 00:11:45,410 --> 00:11:46,613 - Wow, Markie. - Yeah. 377 00:11:46,613 --> 00:11:47,648 Looks like I'm a feminist now. 378 00:11:47,648 --> 00:11:49,217 You're a feminist? 379 00:11:49,217 --> 00:11:50,654 I mean, only when it comes to female violence. 380 00:11:50,654 --> 00:11:52,090 I still feel the same way about equal pay. 381 00:11:52,090 --> 00:11:53,694 Some people just work harder. 382 00:11:53,694 --> 00:11:55,496 I mean, show me a woman who's a CEO. 383 00:11:55,496 --> 00:11:57,166 Elizabeth Holmes. 384 00:11:59,171 --> 00:12:03,179 Okay, we are doing female self-defense 101 right now. 385 00:12:03,179 --> 00:12:04,749 I just want to play football. 386 00:12:04,749 --> 00:12:06,385 - Then you can leave. - Fuck out of here. 387 00:12:06,385 --> 00:12:07,989 [Evan] Guys, I hate to break it to you. 388 00:12:07,989 --> 00:12:09,825 We got some bad news. 389 00:12:09,825 --> 00:12:12,030 I got this email from the school board. 390 00:12:12,030 --> 00:12:15,571 This is a list of things that have been approved 391 00:12:15,571 --> 00:12:17,274 - for the boys' Powderpuff performance. - [grumbling] 392 00:12:17,274 --> 00:12:19,478 Needless to say, the things we've been doing in here 393 00:12:19,478 --> 00:12:21,048 are not on this list. 394 00:12:21,048 --> 00:12:22,785 And they want to kick Shazam out of the party. 395 00:12:22,785 --> 00:12:25,390 - [grumbling] - First, my sister's baby shower, now this. 396 00:12:25,390 --> 00:12:27,629 Do you guys want me to read this list? 397 00:12:27,629 --> 00:12:29,431 - No. - No. 398 00:12:29,431 --> 00:12:31,769 Then why don't I just... 399 00:12:33,239 --> 00:12:36,813 - [cheering] - [laughter] 400 00:12:36,813 --> 00:12:38,015 - Fuck this. - [Tray] Whose house? 401 00:12:38,015 --> 00:12:39,084 - [all] Our house! - Whose house? 402 00:12:39,084 --> 00:12:41,154 - Our house! - [cheering] 403 00:12:41,154 --> 00:12:42,659 [applause] 404 00:12:42,659 --> 00:12:43,794 It's our house. 405 00:12:43,794 --> 00:12:45,197 These-these are gonna fit better 406 00:12:45,197 --> 00:12:47,267 if you really, just, like, stretch. 407 00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:50,240 Love, and then let's... There we go. 408 00:12:50,240 --> 00:12:53,681 Yeah. It's actually a bra, but I wear mine 409 00:12:53,681 --> 00:12:55,250 as a sleep mask when I fly coach. 410 00:12:55,250 --> 00:12:56,753 Okay, Coach Hillridge, you're walking to your car 411 00:12:56,753 --> 00:12:58,489 alone at night. Where are your keys? 412 00:12:58,489 --> 00:12:59,793 - Front pocket. - Wrong. 413 00:12:59,793 --> 00:13:01,161 Attacker, boom, you're dead. 414 00:13:01,161 --> 00:13:02,164 Take your keys, put them right between 415 00:13:02,164 --> 00:13:04,167 your fingers like Wolverine. 416 00:13:04,167 --> 00:13:05,571 - God, that's gonna get him good. - [Shazam] What kind of girls 417 00:13:05,571 --> 00:13:06,906 you run with that you've never seen a bra? 418 00:13:06,906 --> 00:13:08,342 Five, six, seven, eight. 419 00:13:08,342 --> 00:13:10,479 ♪♪ Before you start to blow it... ♪ 420 00:13:10,479 --> 00:13:13,019 - Step together, step together, step together. - [rhythmic clapping] 421 00:13:13,019 --> 00:13:14,421 ♪♪ For a breakdown... ♪ 422 00:13:14,421 --> 00:13:17,094 Come on, boys. Little more sashay, 423 00:13:17,094 --> 00:13:18,764 a little less shantay. 424 00:13:18,764 --> 00:13:20,266 Do you see the way she just did this? 425 00:13:20,266 --> 00:13:22,236 She was like... You know what I mean? 426 00:13:22,236 --> 00:13:24,407 That is-- what do we call it-- marking it. She was marking it. 427 00:13:24,407 --> 00:13:25,644 Markie, you're a beautiful single female, 428 00:13:25,644 --> 00:13:27,147 there's a note on your car. 429 00:13:27,147 --> 00:13:28,783 Probably from an admirer. Let's see what it's about. 430 00:13:28,783 --> 00:13:30,220 Distraction means death. 431 00:13:30,220 --> 00:13:31,389 You're done. 432 00:13:31,389 --> 00:13:33,226 Ah... 433 00:13:33,226 --> 00:13:34,328 Sway, sway. 434 00:13:34,328 --> 00:13:35,898 - Will you marry me? - Yes. 435 00:13:35,898 --> 00:13:37,433 - Of course. - Boom, you're dead. 436 00:13:37,433 --> 00:13:39,905 Your husband's the most likely person to kill you. 437 00:13:39,905 --> 00:13:41,509 Let me see the hands like this. 438 00:13:41,509 --> 00:13:44,081 We saw a nipple. Now we've been disqualified. 439 00:13:44,081 --> 00:13:45,951 - Killer's dead. - [Markie] Check the pulse? 440 00:13:45,951 --> 00:13:47,822 He tricked you, now you're dead. 441 00:13:47,822 --> 00:13:48,957 ♪♪ You don't have to answer... ♪ 442 00:13:48,957 --> 00:13:50,694 Okay, can I see you try that? 443 00:13:50,694 --> 00:13:51,963 Yes. 444 00:13:51,963 --> 00:13:53,266 Boom, you're dead, so is your family. 445 00:13:53,266 --> 00:13:54,869 Boom, you're dead. Boom, you're dead. 446 00:13:54,869 --> 00:13:56,707 [choking sounds] 447 00:13:56,707 --> 00:13:59,979 ♪♪ Gloria ♪ 448 00:13:59,979 --> 00:14:02,250 - ♪♪ Gloria ♪ - ♪♪ Gloria ♪ 449 00:14:02,250 --> 00:14:04,556 ♪♪ I think they got your number... ♪ 450 00:14:04,556 --> 00:14:07,060 Evan, I think they're ready. 451 00:14:07,060 --> 00:14:09,197 Markie, seriously, you've done such a good job today. 452 00:14:09,197 --> 00:14:11,168 - I'm so proud of you. - My eyes are open. 453 00:14:11,168 --> 00:14:13,005 - I've learned a lot, you know? - Thank you. 454 00:14:13,005 --> 00:14:14,475 - Hey. - Give me a little hug. 455 00:14:14,475 --> 00:14:15,944 - Mm-hmm. - My buddy. 456 00:14:15,944 --> 00:14:18,282 - Indeed. - Chloroform, boom, he's dead. 457 00:14:18,282 --> 00:14:20,220 Okay, so, then you guys all get in a line and then I come out 458 00:14:20,220 --> 00:14:23,092 and then I hit the audience with a huge death drop, right? 459 00:14:23,092 --> 00:14:25,162 So it's like, left leg out, right leg back. 460 00:14:25,162 --> 00:14:26,566 - Bam. - [Evan] I don't know, 461 00:14:26,566 --> 00:14:28,136 I think it might be better to just leave 462 00:14:28,136 --> 00:14:30,240 the drag performing to the kids. 463 00:14:30,240 --> 00:14:33,145 No, Mr. Marquez. We want Shazam until the very end. 464 00:14:33,145 --> 00:14:35,049 She steps our pussy up. 465 00:14:35,049 --> 00:14:37,855 Okay, if you guys want Shazam to do a death drop, 466 00:14:37,855 --> 00:14:40,694 Shazam can do a death drop at the end of the performance. 467 00:14:40,694 --> 00:14:42,297 Brayden, you want to count us out? 468 00:14:42,297 --> 00:14:44,769 Full out on three. One, two, three. 469 00:14:44,769 --> 00:14:46,539 [all] Full out! 470 00:14:46,539 --> 00:14:48,910 Let's go, bitches. 471 00:14:48,910 --> 00:14:51,281 Uh, same time tomorrow, guys. 472 00:14:51,281 --> 00:14:53,319 [Shazam] Good hustle. You know, I think 473 00:14:53,319 --> 00:14:55,624 - we're doing a really good thing here. - Me, too. 474 00:14:55,624 --> 00:14:57,795 Is this your iPhone charger? 475 00:14:57,795 --> 00:14:59,298 No, I don't think so. 476 00:14:59,298 --> 00:15:00,801 Well, I am gonna go to the bathroom 477 00:15:00,801 --> 00:15:02,572 because I need to untuck. 478 00:15:02,572 --> 00:15:04,508 - Mama is in pain. - Okay. 479 00:15:04,508 --> 00:15:06,345 Take all the time you need. If you see a bald guy 480 00:15:06,345 --> 00:15:07,949 who looks like he's gonna kill himself, 481 00:15:07,949 --> 00:15:10,352 that's the principal. Just walk the other way. 482 00:15:15,531 --> 00:15:16,800 [Evan] Keith. 483 00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:18,369 You left your duffel bag. 484 00:15:18,369 --> 00:15:20,874 This thing is getting heavier and heavier. 485 00:15:20,874 --> 00:15:22,010 What do you keep in there? 486 00:15:22,010 --> 00:15:23,278 It's fucking wigs, man. 487 00:15:23,278 --> 00:15:24,447 [chuckles] What is this? 488 00:15:24,447 --> 00:15:26,485 - Wigs. - What's in your trunk? 489 00:15:30,994 --> 00:15:32,330 You're stealing from the school? 490 00:15:32,330 --> 00:15:34,234 No, this is stuff I've owned before. 491 00:15:34,234 --> 00:15:36,172 Stuff you've owned before? 492 00:15:36,172 --> 00:15:37,909 What does that even mean? 493 00:15:37,909 --> 00:15:40,647 Oh, my God. What is in this? 494 00:15:42,484 --> 00:15:44,421 Ferret food from Ms. Mallory's class? 495 00:15:44,421 --> 00:15:47,093 I have children to feed, Evan, okay? 496 00:15:47,093 --> 00:15:49,164 You feed your children ferret food? 497 00:15:49,164 --> 00:15:50,568 My ferrets are my kids, Evan. 498 00:15:50,568 --> 00:15:52,236 I don't have a school full of them, all right? 499 00:15:52,236 --> 00:15:53,740 We have to get this fucking stuff back inside. 500 00:15:53,740 --> 00:15:55,442 - Which stuff? - All of it. 501 00:15:55,442 --> 00:15:56,946 - All right, I-I'll help. - No, you can't help. 502 00:15:56,946 --> 00:15:58,683 You're a fucking thief. 503 00:15:58,683 --> 00:16:00,386 Do you understand I vouched for you with the principal? 504 00:16:00,386 --> 00:16:02,257 I should call the fucking cops right now. 505 00:16:02,257 --> 00:16:04,962 Oh, the principal? God, you used to be so punk rock, man. 506 00:16:04,962 --> 00:16:06,666 I don't know, you changed. 507 00:16:06,666 --> 00:16:08,469 You are so fucked-up. 508 00:16:08,469 --> 00:16:10,206 Anyway, I'll see you at rehearsal. 509 00:16:10,206 --> 00:16:12,711 No, you won't, because you're-you're fired. 510 00:16:12,711 --> 00:16:15,718 People are obsessed with saying that to me. 511 00:16:15,718 --> 00:16:18,523 - [car door opens and closes] - We need those printers. - Peace out, Evan. 512 00:16:18,523 --> 00:16:21,461 - [engine starts] - People have to print things at this school. 513 00:16:21,461 --> 00:16:24,000 Thank God you can't fit a fucking copy machine 514 00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:25,503 in that trunk. 515 00:16:27,006 --> 00:16:28,877 [Grant] Ten printers, laser and inkjet. 516 00:16:28,877 --> 00:16:30,180 Five laptops. 517 00:16:30,180 --> 00:16:32,083 Framed picture of me. Mm. 518 00:16:32,083 --> 00:16:34,154 Uh, an American flag. An abacus. 519 00:16:34,154 --> 00:16:36,324 45 pounds of ferret food. 520 00:16:36,324 --> 00:16:37,728 iPhone chargers, 20 to 30 of 'em. 521 00:16:37,728 --> 00:16:39,565 No one can find their iPhone chargers. 522 00:16:39,565 --> 00:16:42,236 Oh, and a student lent Shazam $300. 523 00:16:43,072 --> 00:16:44,709 Well, they're not getting it back. 524 00:16:44,709 --> 00:16:46,846 Uh, look, th-there was no way of knowing, really, 525 00:16:46,846 --> 00:16:49,284 - that she was-- - No, there's no way of knowing? 526 00:16:49,284 --> 00:16:50,554 Your friend Keith has a record, Evan. 527 00:16:50,554 --> 00:16:52,592 We're talking grand larceny here. 528 00:16:52,592 --> 00:16:54,094 - Right. - A criminal drag queen was brought into this school. 529 00:16:54,094 --> 00:16:55,530 You basically conjured 530 00:16:55,530 --> 00:16:57,668 a conservative talking point out of thin air. 531 00:16:57,668 --> 00:17:01,542 Did you not even think to check his, h-her background? 532 00:17:01,542 --> 00:17:04,013 - No, th-this was an old friend. I-- - No, uh, no, 533 00:17:04,013 --> 00:17:06,251 because you were so consumed with your little mission, right? 534 00:17:06,251 --> 00:17:07,655 Okay, well, congratulations, Evan. 535 00:17:07,655 --> 00:17:11,228 Congratulations, you-you succeeded. 536 00:17:11,228 --> 00:17:13,032 - [sighs] Oh, God. - I am canceling 537 00:17:13,032 --> 00:17:16,005 the Powderpuff boys' performance. 538 00:17:16,005 --> 00:17:17,508 - Why? - A three-minute skit 539 00:17:17,508 --> 00:17:18,844 just isn't worth the hassle, all right? 540 00:17:18,844 --> 00:17:20,146 It's-it's already too much. 541 00:17:20,146 --> 00:17:22,216 I'm getting texts from the LGBTQ kids. 542 00:17:22,216 --> 00:17:24,388 I-I don't even know how they got my personal phone number. 543 00:17:24,388 --> 00:17:27,360 And with Superintendent Boone being there, no, no, no, no, no. 544 00:17:27,360 --> 00:17:29,865 Do you understand how big this issue is? 545 00:17:29,865 --> 00:17:32,938 This isn't just about a little skit at a football game. 546 00:17:32,938 --> 00:17:34,341 This is about drag. 547 00:17:34,341 --> 00:17:37,413 Yeah, you... you made it about drag. 548 00:17:38,282 --> 00:17:40,553 - [water fizzing] - [Grant exhales] 549 00:17:41,488 --> 00:17:43,660 - Purr. - [Gwen] Wait. 550 00:17:43,660 --> 00:17:45,631 - So she had a record? - [Evan] Yeah, I mean, 551 00:17:45,631 --> 00:17:48,704 you can just never predict that someone has three DUIs 552 00:17:48,704 --> 00:17:51,441 and is permanently banned from the Austin Zoo. 553 00:17:51,441 --> 00:17:53,045 - We got to go there. - We do. 554 00:17:53,045 --> 00:17:54,448 We have to go there, don't forget that. 555 00:17:54,448 --> 00:17:56,018 The point is, I didn't know. 556 00:17:56,018 --> 00:17:57,588 It's awful that it's over, you know? 557 00:17:57,588 --> 00:17:59,424 It's just, like, it's over, it's over. 558 00:17:59,424 --> 00:18:01,328 I guess the girls' football game will be fun. 559 00:18:01,328 --> 00:18:03,466 Yeah, I don't know how much football they learned, 560 00:18:03,466 --> 00:18:06,338 but they're not gonna get killed at a highway rest stop. 561 00:18:06,338 --> 00:18:08,108 I can guarantee it. 562 00:18:08,108 --> 00:18:09,545 I think I'm not gonna go to the game anyway. 563 00:18:09,545 --> 00:18:11,481 You got to come to the football game. 564 00:18:11,481 --> 00:18:13,820 I don't know, it's so sad now. 565 00:18:13,820 --> 00:18:15,724 It would mean a lot to me that you come and you're just 566 00:18:15,724 --> 00:18:17,595 in the stand... I worked really hard. 567 00:18:17,595 --> 00:18:19,430 - Yeah. - You can bring a book and just, like, chill. 568 00:18:19,430 --> 00:18:21,769 - Yeah, I'll go. - Thank you. 569 00:18:21,769 --> 00:18:22,805 [Nick] Goddamn it! 570 00:18:22,805 --> 00:18:24,007 Is that Nick out there? 571 00:18:24,007 --> 00:18:25,343 Oh, yeah. He's working on the pool. 572 00:18:25,343 --> 00:18:26,879 What is he doing again? 573 00:18:26,879 --> 00:18:28,348 He's building a pool by hand? 574 00:18:28,348 --> 00:18:30,153 We're, like, basically saving so much money. 575 00:18:30,153 --> 00:18:31,622 Because he doesn't need bulldozers. 576 00:18:31,622 --> 00:18:33,225 He doesn't need people. He just needs himself. 577 00:18:33,225 --> 00:18:34,461 And shovels and all that stuff. 578 00:18:34,461 --> 00:18:36,431 That sounds so crazy. 579 00:18:36,431 --> 00:18:39,104 No, it's just concrete and digging, I think. 580 00:18:39,104 --> 00:18:41,776 And then, once it's done, it's gonna get listed on Swimply. 581 00:18:41,776 --> 00:18:43,647 What's the word that you're saying? 582 00:18:43,647 --> 00:18:45,215 Swimply's an app where you, like, list your pool 583 00:18:45,215 --> 00:18:47,153 in your backyard and you rent it for hours 584 00:18:47,153 --> 00:18:50,393 to people-- strangers-- and they pay you. 585 00:18:50,393 --> 00:18:52,063 - While your home? - While we're home. 586 00:18:52,063 --> 00:18:54,835 And then you charge more if they come in and use your bathroom. 587 00:18:54,835 --> 00:18:56,171 Well, good for you. 588 00:18:56,171 --> 00:18:57,641 I'll get him to explain it to you. Nick! 589 00:18:57,641 --> 00:18:59,243 - No, you don't need to get him. - No, no. Nick! 590 00:18:59,243 --> 00:19:00,614 - You don't have to come. - You d-- 591 00:19:00,614 --> 00:19:01,749 Oh, hey, Nick. 592 00:19:01,749 --> 00:19:03,252 Hey. 593 00:19:03,252 --> 00:19:04,756 - [Gwen] Hi. - Hey, babe, what's up? 594 00:19:04,756 --> 00:19:06,726 I was just, um, bragging about the, 595 00:19:06,726 --> 00:19:08,964 - the pool. - Yeah, yeah, I mean, look. 596 00:19:08,964 --> 00:19:11,736 It's like nobody in this neighborhood is on Swimply. 597 00:19:11,736 --> 00:19:14,842 They have pools, but they're not on the app, but, like, 598 00:19:14,842 --> 00:19:16,478 I was at Trader Joe's the other day and I think 599 00:19:16,478 --> 00:19:18,416 my neighbor heard me talking to you about it, 600 00:19:18,416 --> 00:19:20,887 so this is, like, a rush dig, it's gonna be a rush dig. 601 00:19:20,887 --> 00:19:23,426 All right, well, I s... I support that. 602 00:19:23,426 --> 00:19:25,029 I think it's cool. I think it's inspiring. 603 00:19:25,029 --> 00:19:26,966 It's so much fun. All right, I got to get back outside. 604 00:19:26,966 --> 00:19:28,202 Okay, bye. 605 00:19:28,202 --> 00:19:29,672 - Mwah. Love you. - My little pool man. 606 00:19:29,672 --> 00:19:30,974 Nice to see you. 607 00:19:30,974 --> 00:19:32,277 [Nick] Good to see you, Evan. 608 00:19:32,277 --> 00:19:33,713 You guys are so cute. 609 00:19:33,713 --> 00:19:35,215 It's so good that he has this, though. 610 00:19:35,215 --> 00:19:36,619 'Cause he needs to be distracted. 611 00:19:36,619 --> 00:19:39,858 'Cause the looking for a job thing was a lot. 612 00:19:46,171 --> 00:19:47,942 [crowd cheering, clamoring] 613 00:19:47,942 --> 00:19:49,512 Get the fuck back! 614 00:19:49,512 --> 00:19:51,214 - [whistle blows] - [Gwen screams] - [Markie] Yeah! 615 00:19:51,214 --> 00:19:53,419 - Yeah! Yes! - Do we get points for that? 616 00:19:53,419 --> 00:19:55,122 - We do, we do. Go for one! - Oh! 617 00:19:55,122 --> 00:19:56,491 - Yeah, yeah! - Oh! 618 00:19:56,491 --> 00:19:57,895 - Oh! - Yeah. 619 00:19:57,895 --> 00:19:59,197 [Harry] Evan. 620 00:19:59,197 --> 00:20:01,101 - Oh, hey. - Hey. 621 00:20:01,101 --> 00:20:03,271 - How's it going? - Good to see you. 622 00:20:03,271 --> 00:20:05,309 Hey, do you know anybody who has, like, 623 00:20:05,309 --> 00:20:07,179 20 printers I could use? 624 00:20:07,179 --> 00:20:08,683 [laughs] 625 00:20:08,683 --> 00:20:09,886 That's funny. 626 00:20:09,886 --> 00:20:11,155 [Rick] Hey, hey, hey. 627 00:20:11,155 --> 00:20:13,560 Oh, Superintendent Boone, this is 628 00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:15,429 our college counselor Rick. 629 00:20:15,429 --> 00:20:16,966 It's a pleasure to meet you, Rick. 630 00:20:16,966 --> 00:20:19,170 As long as you don't ask me for a raise, that is. 631 00:20:19,170 --> 00:20:20,908 [laughter] 632 00:20:20,908 --> 00:20:23,546 Actually, um, if I could grab five to chat 633 00:20:23,546 --> 00:20:25,449 about that with you, that would be sick. 634 00:20:25,449 --> 00:20:27,955 Maybe we hit up Ruth's Chris, fellas? 635 00:20:27,955 --> 00:20:29,691 [blowing whistle] 636 00:20:29,691 --> 00:20:31,495 All right, whatever, I'm gonna head home. 637 00:20:31,495 --> 00:20:32,898 - Nice to see you. - Yeah? 638 00:20:32,898 --> 00:20:34,300 - You're out? - Yeah. 639 00:20:34,300 --> 00:20:36,071 - Okay. - [horns honking] 640 00:20:36,071 --> 00:20:37,908 Whoa, what's happening here? 641 00:20:37,908 --> 00:20:40,479 [cheering] 642 00:20:41,682 --> 00:20:44,454 Evan, what the hell is going on? 643 00:20:44,454 --> 00:20:47,728 They did this themselves! I... was not involved with this. 644 00:20:47,728 --> 00:20:49,999 Hey, yo, let me ask you something. 645 00:20:49,999 --> 00:20:51,435 Do we offend you? 646 00:20:51,435 --> 00:20:53,740 Someone taught us something. 647 00:20:53,740 --> 00:20:56,879 That even if things don't go your way or work out, 648 00:20:56,879 --> 00:20:58,884 we don't mark it. 649 00:20:58,884 --> 00:21:01,155 We go full-out, baby. 650 00:21:01,155 --> 00:21:03,059 Thank you, Coach Marquez. 651 00:21:03,059 --> 00:21:06,398 And even if you don't understand what I'm talking about, 652 00:21:06,398 --> 00:21:08,202 then you about to learn. 653 00:21:08,202 --> 00:21:09,505 You bitches ready? 654 00:21:09,505 --> 00:21:10,473 [all] Ready. 655 00:21:10,473 --> 00:21:12,310 One, two, three, four. 656 00:21:12,310 --> 00:21:14,648 ["The Warrior" by Scandal playing] 657 00:21:16,251 --> 00:21:20,292 ♪♪ Oh... ♪ 658 00:21:20,292 --> 00:21:22,329 [laughing] 659 00:21:23,032 --> 00:21:26,672 ♪♪ Oh... ♪ 660 00:21:28,275 --> 00:21:30,079 ♪♪ You run, run ♪ 661 00:21:30,079 --> 00:21:31,615 ♪♪ Run away ♪ 662 00:21:31,615 --> 00:21:33,351 ♪♪ It's your heart ♪ 663 00:21:33,351 --> 00:21:35,990 ♪♪ That you betray ♪ 664 00:21:35,990 --> 00:21:39,732 - ♪♪ Well, isn't love primitive ♪ - Yes. 665 00:21:39,732 --> 00:21:41,301 ♪♪ A wild gift... ♪ 666 00:21:41,301 --> 00:21:43,974 Markie! Markie, control your players! 667 00:21:43,974 --> 00:21:46,111 Who do you think gave them the keys to the carts? 668 00:21:46,111 --> 00:21:49,451 - Let the girls dance. - Whoo! 669 00:21:49,451 --> 00:21:51,455 Hell yeah, Markie. 670 00:21:51,455 --> 00:21:53,860 Hey, man, Powderpuff is tradition. 671 00:21:53,860 --> 00:21:55,664 ♪♪ Your heart's still wild ♪ 672 00:21:55,664 --> 00:21:57,534 ♪♪ Shootin' at the walls of heartache ♪ 673 00:21:57,534 --> 00:21:59,070 ♪♪ Bang, bang... ♪ 674 00:21:59,070 --> 00:22:00,774 Whoo! 675 00:22:00,774 --> 00:22:02,010 Yo, yo, yo. 676 00:22:02,010 --> 00:22:04,180 - It's time for the death drop. - You're in. 677 00:22:04,180 --> 00:22:06,018 ♪♪ I am the warrior ♪ 678 00:22:06,018 --> 00:22:09,156 ♪♪ And heart to heart you'll win ♪ 679 00:22:09,156 --> 00:22:10,827 Aah, yeah! 680 00:22:10,827 --> 00:22:12,496 ♪♪ Heart to heart you'll win ♪ 681 00:22:12,496 --> 00:22:14,066 [joints crack] 682 00:22:14,066 --> 00:22:16,004 [all gasping, murmuring] 683 00:22:16,004 --> 00:22:18,910 [grunting] 684 00:22:20,279 --> 00:22:22,116 ♪♪ If you survive ♪ 685 00:22:22,116 --> 00:22:23,820 [crowd cheering] 686 00:22:23,820 --> 00:22:27,093 - [chanting] - ♪♪ The warrior... ♪ 687 00:22:27,093 --> 00:22:30,466 I'm so sorry, I did not expect this to happen. 688 00:22:30,466 --> 00:22:32,303 Are you kidding? 689 00:22:32,303 --> 00:22:34,675 It was funny as hell. [laughs] 690 00:22:34,675 --> 00:22:37,246 Back in my day, when we did Powderpuff, 691 00:22:37,246 --> 00:22:39,518 they told us to go whole hog. 692 00:22:39,518 --> 00:22:41,021 That was whole hog 693 00:22:41,021 --> 00:22:43,994 and an extra half hog for good measure. 694 00:22:43,994 --> 00:22:47,534 [cheering, clamoring] 695 00:22:49,805 --> 00:22:52,476 ♪ ♪ 696 00:22:59,290 --> 00:23:03,766 ♪♪ Shootin' at the walls of heartache... ♪ 697 00:23:03,766 --> 00:23:06,772 They actually fucking did it. 698 00:23:07,807 --> 00:23:09,244 Work. 699 00:23:09,244 --> 00:23:10,714 ♪♪ The warrior ♪ 700 00:23:10,714 --> 00:23:14,621 ♪♪ And heart to heart you'll win ♪ 701 00:23:14,621 --> 00:23:17,828 ♪♪ Heart to heart you'll win ♪ 702 00:23:17,828 --> 00:23:21,334 ♪♪ If you survive ♪ 703 00:23:21,334 --> 00:23:26,011 ♪♪ The warrior, the warrior ♪ 704 00:23:26,011 --> 00:23:29,083 ♪♪ Shootin' at the walls of heartache ♪ 705 00:23:29,083 --> 00:23:30,787 ♪♪ Bang, bang ♪ 706 00:23:30,787 --> 00:23:33,826 ♪♪ I am the warrior ♪ 707 00:23:33,826 --> 00:23:37,066 ♪♪ Shootin' at the walls of heartache ♪ 708 00:23:37,066 --> 00:23:38,869 ♪♪ Bang, bang ♪ 709 00:23:38,869 --> 00:23:41,842 ♪♪ I am the warrior ♪ 710 00:23:41,842 --> 00:23:44,781 ♪♪ Shootin' at the walls of heartache ♪ 711 00:23:44,781 --> 00:23:46,484 ♪♪ Bang, bang ♪ 712 00:23:46,484 --> 00:23:49,792 ♪♪ I am the warrior ♪ 713 00:23:50,561 --> 00:23:53,899 ♪♪ Yes, I am the warrior ♪ 714 00:23:53,899 --> 00:23:57,641 ♪♪ Victory is mine ♪ 715 00:23:57,641 --> 00:24:01,882 - ♪♪ Shootin' at the walls of heartache ♪ - ♪♪ The warrior ♪ 716 00:24:01,882 --> 00:24:04,889 ♪♪ I am the warrior ♪ 717 00:24:04,889 --> 00:24:08,161 ♪♪ Shootin' at the walls of heartache. ♪